Back from the dead...

I deeply apologize to anyone who began reading this blog and actual enjoyed it, started following it, and then came to realize that I don't update it very often. Why? Since you ask, I started this blog in Nice, France where I had no responsibilities other than 2-3 hours of rehearsal per day. I was a block from the beach, and I never had to cook a meal. Idealism reigned, and I needed a project. I chose to start of blog with a theme: “The Greatest Moment of my Life” where each day I was to deem one moment as the greatest moment of my life.

Now, this idealistic passion has given way to logistics: My busy life, my insatiable proclivities to distraction/randomness, and my absolutely horrendous typing “skills”. I think I am just trying to hard. Aiming to manufacture profundity almost always misses the mark. This certainly does not mean that I will stop trying... Always aiming to harness the creative nodes of the thinly spread multitasking jack of all trades that is me; that is my quest. I can't make everyone happy all of the time, and it no longer bothers me that this is the case.

So Stephanos, suck it. I may be the worst blogger ever, but I'm not going to stop trying.

It occurred to me that it is entirely possible, nay, likely, that a good majority of the people that I call and consider my friends don't really know me and my life. I am a habitual wall builder; trying in vain to separate the various elemental foundations of my life. I suppose this may be perceived as a safer way to live. But safe sucks, and I’m tired of it.

I was recently reminded by one of my hero's that I used to be fearless. That's a lie, really. I wasn't fearless, just ignorant to fear. Living without fear is only possible when you have nothing to be afraid of. And, for those who love, fear is inevitability. Like God, the wind, and love... its a tangible illusion whose presence is undeniable and unavoidable. But, fear cannot effect who you are until it effects what you do. The older I get, the more fear effects my decisions. And, I do miss that simpler, less aware version of me… but I don’t miss his hubris.

I am a tragically unfocused perfectionist. But, this is what drives me to be great. Yet, it makes me a narcissist. But, it also makes me really charming. However, not everyone thinks I am charming. As wrong as these people are, sometimes I wish they weren't. Hard work and uncommon talent are often confusing and temperamental bed fellows, and charm can easily serve as the catalyst for their disharmony. Whatever that means...

Anyway, thanks for reading my random thoughts. If you like them, that’s rad. If not, no worries. Stop reading. I will continue with my catharsis now.

BrenBoz, thanks for saying you read my blog. I might have stopped had you not. Seriously. Thanks.

The greatest moment of my life was at Josh Ottum's rock show when Brendan Bosworth told me he reads my blog.

Are you ready?

I said, "ARE YOU READY??????!!!!!!!"

Then, for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching at home....

Llllllllllets get ready for some football!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The greatest moment of my life was the start of the 2009 NFL season.

A simple Hello

I tend to lose sight of the gravity and power of my simplest decisions. I think that all too often I am trying to manufacture moments rather than seizing those that are tangibly there, yet for some reason go unrecognized. And, often, they are truly moments. Hesitate, and the opportunity is gone, or claimed by another. The older and more calculated I get the more challenging it becomes to trust my instinct. React rather than deliberate. There is a time and place for all things. When do I need to be pensive? When must I make haste? Wisdom and knowledge are not the same thing. Wisdom is simple. Knowledge is endlessly complex. Yet, the more we know the wiser we can become. Dichotomy? Welcome to the human race.

Anyhoisen, a little over a week ago, I was at the airport in Nice getting ready to make the long trek home to Seattle after a wonderful, exhausting, yet mildly disappointing week on the riviera (I didn't win the competition... nor did i place. But, I am told we are all winners... I was not aware how akin opera competitions are to youth sports in this regard, but i digress). I got my iPod going strong with some remastered Zepplin mixed in with a little magical mystery tour and a fresh bag of french gummi bears and a perrier. I was in my happy place and was not looking for any non-essential human interaction.

But, after about 45 minutes of me time ( I got to the airport soooo early, but the ride was free so I can't complain... plus, better early than late) I noticed a young lady walking around the gate looking a bit like a lost puppy. She looked a bit like the way I felt when I first arrived in Athens back in November 08... Scared, uncertain, lonely, yet trying to look like she had half a clue. This is the kind of scene that I have seen before (forgive the homophone) yet chose to ignore or write off to the responsibility of an unnamed/unseen other. Not a big responsibility. Just decency. A simple hello.

As a seasoned traveler, I know that if i am at the gate more than an hour before the flight is scheduled to board that there is virtually no chance that there will be someone at said gate to answer your questions... My wife will tell you that I am usually not the most observant guy, but I know fear when i see it, and this young lady needed a little help.

"Hello, are you on the flight to London? If so, you are in the right place. The crew will be here shortly." Anyone who knows me understands that this is a paraphrase as my eloquence is generally limited in the present tense. Regardless, long story short, Daniella, my new facebook friend is a 19 year old German student that until that day had never flown before and was heading to a small town in a country she had yet to visit to take a job as an opare (nanny) for a family she had not yet met just after leaving her best friend and family for a period of at least a year... We ended up chatting for the entire time leading up to the flight. She is a sweet girl roughly the same age as my niece Raleigh. If it were her, I would not have hesitated to help. In this case, it took a moment.

Im not trying to toot my own horn. Quite the opposite. I was happy that i could help. I didn't go out of my way at all. My big sacrifice was not listening to the Immigrant song for the umpteenth time. After we parted, I could not think of anything but the multitude of occasions in which I have seen similar events unfold only to sit on my hands and let somebody else (or nobody) deal with it.

I guess the reason i am sharing is to hopefully encourage those that are like me to be open to the moments we can make a difference regardless of how small they may be.

The greatest moment of my life was the day i decided to say hello to the German girl at the airport in Nice.

D-baggery

One thing that I noticed about myself this week:

Whenever I go to any European country, my English takes on a distinctly British flavor. My fake accent is weak sauce. I know its bad, but it just happens. Further d-baggifying myself, I say things like "Cheers", "Bullocks", "Brilliant", "Tosser", and other proper British colloquialisms as if they are as common to me as my typical US slang (IE: Dude, Balls, Lame, or Ass).

Is it so bad that I want to upgrade my euphemistic vulgarities? No. But is it necessary? Also no.

Today, the greatest moment of my life was the realization that whether it be balls, or whether it be bullocks, nothing matters if you live as without the sack to carry them.

perfect

I just got done with P90X yoga in one of the practice rooms at the hotel. There isn't nearly enough room for me to work out in my hotel room, even without the Romanian guy named Cozmine that shares the space with me. He's very cool, laid back, and what not. So, its not a big deal having a roommate at all. Plus I am only in the room to change, sleep, and shower. Otherwise I am rehearsing, eating, walking to the beach, swimming, etc.

Anyway, yoga. After i finished, i went out to the lobby to get some water and "Eternal Flame" by the Bangles was playing over the sound system. Greatest moment of my life? Duh.

Self indulgent

After one of our group coachings today, one of my colleagues jokingly asked if I would autograph a photograph that she had taken of me. She told me that I sound like Juan Diego Florez and that I'm going to be super famous. While I appreciate the sentiment and I don't doubt her sincerity, fame is not the end I am working toward. Nor do I generally like to even acknowledge comments like this. But, I'm on the Riviera for 3 more days, life is good, and this was the best moment of my life.

Day Two on the Riviera

Not all of these blog posts are going to be the multiple paragraph type. Sometimes I'm tired, and sometimes I can get right to the point without rambling on (rare, I know).

So, the greatest moment of my life was tonight's dinner at a villa that is owned by the sponsor of the competition here in Nice.

Words fail, so here are some pictures...

The view from dinner. Me and my friend Emily who is doing the same competition...



All kinds of awesome...



One more for good measure...